I don't worry about you

Recently, I listened to this podcast interview with Natalie Portman on Glennon Doyle’s You Can Do Hard Things.

I’ve always loved Natalie Portman — I think she’s an incredible actor and I loved the active stance she took in the #MeToo movement several years ago.

It’s a great podcast episode with a lot gems throughout – but the part I liked the most was when Glennon’s wife, Abby asked Natalie, “What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?”

Natalie didn’t skip a beat. She said it the time her cousin, who is one of her closest friends, said, “Natalie, I don’t worry about you.”

Natalie went on to share that she has a habit of doubting herself — which often leads her down a spiral of ruminating on her shortcomings. Once, she was lamenting about her troubles to her cousin. Her cousin then lovingly responded that she isn’t a bit worried about Natalie because she knows that Natalie is strong, resilient, and more than capable of handling the challenges that come her way.

Natalie said that it was one of the most comforting and empowering things anyone ever said to her – for someone so close to her to believe in her so much. 

This resonated with me — it made me think about the power of one’s mindset.

It reminded me of a mantra I often say to myself which is this:  Everything I need to be successful is already inside of me. 

Being a therapist turned entrepreneur came with a pretty steep learning curve. You may recall that my major in college wasn’t business or accounting but rather… theology – a topic I found incredibly interesting but that hasn’t proven to be super helpful in the board room. To date, not one investor or advisor has asked me my thoughts on Thomas Aquinas, Martin Luther, or the virgin birth. 😂

Everything – literally everything – I know about starting and growing a business, I learned by paying attention to really smart people, being curious, asking lots of questions, and, ya know…google.

There have been many worrisome days and sleepless nights where I felt in over my head. But, those moments of self doubt and not knowing has also birthed an ability to do one thing really well which is… just. figure. it. out.

Most of the time, I have found that the only way out is through. It’s all about practicing, messing up, trying again, and believing that I have what it takes — that we all have what it takes — to learn, grow, and reach our full potential.

This mentality of believing each person is capable of great things served me well as a therapist and supervisor. As a clinician, I never saw myself as the expert in the room. Rather, I saw the client as the person who was most capable of solving their own problems. And I viewed my supervisees as packed with potential, on the cusp of making their own unique impact on our field.

My job, as I saw it, was just to help clear the cobwebs getting in their way, to be a mirror, reflecting their strengths back to them, and to be a co-collaborator as they mastered their skills.

It seems like the most natural way to wrap up my reflections today is to speak directly to each of you, many of whom I’ve gotten to know well over the years, and say that I believe everything you need to succeed as a clinician is already inside of you.

You, no doubt, are already having a life-changing impact on your clients and supervisees – an impact that will only grow stronger as you hone and deepen your skills.

I hope you believe in yourself as much as I believe in you. 

As always, I love hearing from you so if you have anything you’d like to share, please feel free to reply to me here.