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Aug 29, 2022

Comma, yet

Rachel McCrickard, LMFT

CEO and Co-Founder

As therapists, we know that language is important. The words we use have an impact on our beliefs about ourselves and the world around us.

There are certain words that I’ve tried to remove from my vocabulary. These are words that convey black-and-white-thinking, shame, or blame. A few examples are words like: should, always, and never.

On the flip side, there are other words that I’m trying to incorporate more intentionally into my life. Words like:

  • No, thank you – when setting a boundary for myself
  • Yes – when I want to stretch myself to try something new
  • Yet – when I want to leave space for future change

Today, I want to talk about the word: Yet.

Yet is an interesting word, isn’t it? It’s a tiny little thing, tacked on the end of some of our sentences – but it’s packed with intention, expectation, and even hope.

Here’s what I mean…

Saying, “I’m not good at parallel parking” is very different than saying, “I’m not good at parallel parking, yet.”

The first is definitive – it leaves little room to question the statement. It conveys absolute truth and finality.

But the second statement leaves room for change. It creates a window for something that might be true today, to no longer be true tomorrow.

Have you seen the John Cusack movie, High Fidelity? It’s one of my husband’s favorites. The word “yet” makes me think of this classic scene in the record store…

High Fidelity -

Yet has become one of my favorite words for one simple reason – it’s packed with possibility. It transforms a statement that seems to have an ending, into a statement that conveys there is more to come.

Here are a few of the ways I’m incorporating yet into my own life right now:

  • I haven’t found a community in my new city, yet.
  • I’m not sure how to solve this particular problem, yet.
  • I’m not ready to talk about this painful memory, yet.
  • I don’t have a second dog, yet. 😜

This concept can extend beyond ourself and into our work with clients and supervisees.

If I think back to my early years as a clinician, I often felt in over my head. I can remember those first few sessions during my practicum, where I sat wide-eyed in front of a client and fumbled my way through a few reflective statements and open-ended questions. 

I wasn’t an effective therapist, yet.

But, through practice, clinical supervision, and my own therapy, I began to find my way.

You, too, are no doubt finding your way – be it in your work as a therapist, a supervisor, or a practice owner.

As you sit with your clients and/or with yourself this week, perhaps try to remember the story isn’t over – there is more to come, more to learn, more ways to grow and evolve. 

Does this bring any thoughts or reflections you’d like to share with me? As always, I love hearing from you.

Warmly,
Rachel
Rachel McCrickard, LMFT
CEO/Co-Founder, Motivo
rachel@motivohealth.com

Each Monday, I’ll share my perspective on topics that mean a lot to me: growth, resilience, relationships, and leadership.

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